The famed Botanical Garden at Peradeniya, just off Kandy, is infested by doting couples. Every tree has its young couple, some in complicated postures. Tree trunks have been engraved with names of lovers. This has resulted in immense confusion for avid botanists who mistake these names for scientific names of the trees. The overcrowding of names in these tree barks has meant that some couples have to bring in a ladder and rope to be able to write their name, isolated from the rest down below, lest an affair is mistaken for a love triangle. Parents inspect tree barks every day to check for their daughter’s names. Love Police whistle rabidly whenever they spot lovers violating acceptable positions.
My dear Romeos and Juliets, stay away from those bat dwellings. Those bat droppings are your biggest threats. If you have the time to look away from each other, only if for a while, mind where you look. Over there, look at that newly wed couple who have come for a photo shoot. You could be in their place soon. Look at that pair of squirrels frolicking around. And look at that old couple too, walking with bent backs, one ahead of the other, irritated by the green. When you reach their age, remember to hold each other's hands.