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Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Curry crisis in fortress UK

With a new set of immigration laws set to be enforced in the UK, Bangladeshi migrants will find it much tougher to land up there. This is expected to result in a severe shortage of manpower in the 9000 or so Indian curry houses in the UK that will now be forced to hire East Europeans for making curry. As such, many patrons are reasonably scared that sausages will crop up in a chicken vindaloo dish and gajar ka halwa will get mixed with sauerkraut. To ease the situation, the UK government might consider making it compulsory for curry houses to install vending machines in front of them for vending pre-cooked curry meals so that restaurants don’t have long waiting times. As an extreme measure, they might also consider banning curry food as a security threat.

In today’s world, while the western economies pay awesome lip service to the grandeurs of globalization, they keep on imposing ever stringent restrictions on movement of people. Foreigners, particularly if they belong to certain races, are assumed to be suicide bombers by default, unless they can prove otherwise. As such, local sentiments are stoked up to gain support for political parties supporting such causes in democratic societies that institutionalize suppression of minority opinion in any case. The local sentiments in these countries are also well adapted to the idea that immigration, particularly from certain races, are bad for the economy, bad for local culture, and bad for roaming around in the streets. Even when migrants are allowed into these rich countries, they are often fleeced and humiliated in various forms. They have to fill up tedious forms on every occasion, are often denied social security despite paying taxes, are forced to take HIV tests, and are denied the right to vote despite being forced to obey local laws. Foreign students are often fleeced to subsidize education of the locals.

One of the most obvious ways to reduce global poverty would be to allow free movement of labor. A typical barber in UK makes over $3000 a month while a Bangladeshi barber makes fifty times less for putting in the same amount of work. Of course, the $3000 salary has been built up owing to the capacities of the local economies to support such salaries. However, this capacity in these economies have been built to a significant extent through colonization, when access to captive colonized markets and their un-priced resources were combined with re-investment of most of these profits in the colonizing markets. No wonder, the best companies are therefore to be found in these western countries, same applies for educational institutions, healthcare facilities, and much else.

So what’s the solution for citizens from the Third world countries? As Asian Dub Foundation says, “Keep banging on the walls of fortress Europe”.


Anonymous said...

Well, people will still queue up to leave for these first world countries.

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr Spears,

Fret not, for a possible solution might lie in establishing a curry academy or if you will, Academy of Curry Excellence, ACE in short, where, besides culling spicy culinary skills, prospective migrant chefs can also spice up their English language fluency with added emphasis on cultivating an estuary English accent, helping them attain higher points to meet immigration criteria.

So, Monsieur Chutney, what say we lobby support for the immediate formation of ACE, lest there be a sharp onslaught of kiełbasa korma, aloo palak goulash or even sauerkraut chutney, eh?

Viva authentic potato bhaji!